Last week, I dove into qualities that we need to look for in a partner, particularly that the girls need to look for in a guy before getting in a relationship with him. But this week, we have such an exciting post for you! Koa wrote this special post from a guys perspective, on what the boys should be looking for in a girl. This one is so special and one that I hope we all can learn from - whether it's for a guy, learning to raise his standards, or for the girls, and the Lord puts some areas of growth on her heart.
Before we dive in, would you mind joining in prayer? Dear Jesus, thank you for this day and another opportunity to glorify your name and love you! As we move along into the week, let us fix our eyes on you and represent you to those around us. Thank you again for another day and it is in your name I pray, Amen.
So first I would like to say that I am no expert in dating, but looking out for these values helps create a Christ centered relationship! Building a Christ centered relationship isn’t going to happen overnight. Just as our relationship with the Father, it takes time and intentionality.
Before dating, you should understand that neither are perfect. Both partners should acknowledge this and help build up each other's relationship with the Lord. This naturally builds a focus set on God by both ends because you know only He can complete you, not the other person. Instead of looking for the perfect girl, look at her heart posture and her character, and be willing to commit to becoming more like Jesus together.
She should have a heart on fire for the Lord. Having your person be on fire for the Lord makes it significantly safer and easier to have a Christ centered relationship. In her lowest valleys, she still relies on the Lord. Her actions should very distinctly portray her devotion for Him, especially through the way she treats others. You can see this when she loves others in a way that is warm and welcoming. The way she treats me makes me feel prioritized and cared for, and brings a special peace and stillness into my life. She should always be faithful to Christ and to her partner. When you can run towards Jesus with your girl hand in hand, the foundation for your relationship will be much stronger. Not only can we rely on Jesus, but we can rely on him together!
Working as a team and carrying each other's weight is something beautiful and I feel that that is how God designed it to be! Some key points I wanna hit on specifically about this value is in Ecclesiastes 4: 9-12.
Verse 9: “Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor”
I presume this as “teamwork makes the dreamwork”. It’s important to know your partner’s intentions, including that they are ready to work together as a team, because a relationship is two-sided.
Verse 10 states that, “If either of them falls down, one can help the other up.”
It’s comforting knowing that my partner is there with me ready to fight for me and pray for me throughout tough seasons. She is there by my side and is ready to pick me back up! (By the way, my girlfriend does an exceptional job at this, making me feel loved and comforted even if I may have stumbled! She encourages me to keep pushing forward and leaning on Christ!)
The last verse I would like to hit on is verse 12, which says, “Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.”
I interpret this as although my partner and I may be strong, Jesus as our foundation makes us even stronger! His love and mercy for us is beyond what we could ever imagine and because of Him we are where we are today. Through Jesus’ grace, we get to learn how to love each other in a way that reflects Him, and that is what makes a relationship truly successful. (AMEN)
You should have a mutual desire to serve one another. Personally, serving is one of my favorite things to do for my significant other, whether that be to get her flowers, her favorite Sonic drink, or even just being there for her when she needs me! But more importantly being served is such an incredible feeling. She surprises me with gifts and letters that make me feel so loved and so special! Even little things like writing sticky notes expressing her love for me make my day. Having this value is something God commands us to do for others and something we should look for! In Matthew 20:28, it states that Christ came to serve and not be served, and when your partner goes out of her way to serve and honor you, it’s a reflection of His love for us. Ultimately, we should serve others and be the hands and feet of Jesus, not just for our significant other, but for all those around us.
We all want a strong, healthy relationship, but sometimes we forget that we need Jesus to become that, and that hurts our relationships. Finding that person who loves Jesus and follows Him is something people should take into consideration when dating. A girl doesn’t need to be perfect in every aspect, but it’s important that she loves Jesus as much as you do. When couples find this, the relationship becomes holy! It becomes a reflection of the beautiful love that Christ showed us and the kind of love that Christ intended it to be!
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